panalong picture

i think papu posted this already, pero aliw, e. this was during the embryology christmas party/inuman at her house last saturday.

can('t) get away from work

i've been on leave since december 21, & will be back in the office on january 2. ang haba ng bakasyon ko, woohoo!

sa kasamaang-palad, hindi pa sanay ang biological clock ko sa walang pasok. woke up at 6am yesterday, 7am today. anyway...

do you know about g-live alerts? those are the messages that globe sends for free, & that flash on your phone's LCD from time to time. natawa ako sa alert kahapon ng umaga:

"BSP cuts overnight rates by 25 bps."

grace the bank employee reacts: 25 basis points? that means that the reverse repurchase rate is down to 5.25% and the repurchase rate is now at 7.25%. ang baba na....

of course, grace the girl on vacation also has a reaction: what the, i'm on leave! tsaka ko na lang iisipin yan. hehe. : )

merry christmas!

it really is a merry christmas for me. buti na lang. :)

balanced

You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning. Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Are You Right or Left Brained?

mortification beyond blushing

i haven't blogged in a week because i didn't have anything to blog about. i was actually in netopia southmall yesterday evening, but i really couldn't think of anything worth posting. i haven't read a new book, or watched a new movie. i don't have much to say regarding the earthquake (despite having felt it) & the coup attempt (because i haven't read the papers yet, & we weren't listening to the radio while it was going on).

so, have i already established that i have nothing to blog about?

well, that was a couple of hours ago. in true i-can't-believe-it-happened-to-me fashion, i now have something to blog about.

after the prayer meeting, deirdre & i decided to have coffee at mocha blends.

= = = = = = = = = =

(while deirdre was parking the car)
grace: siguro sasabihin nila, "eto na naman yung dalawang nakabasag ng bote!"
(we broke a water bottle there almost two months ago, as we were standing up to leave)

= = = = = = = = = =

(before the food was served, grace bumps into her glass, spilling peach tea all over her blouse & pants)
grace: (to the waiter) sorry, sorry!
(waiter hands grace tissue, starts wiping the spill)
grace: (to deirdre) i'll go to the CR muna to clean up.

= = = = = = = = = =

(grace is in the CR, drying her shirt. she hears the door open, & sees a mocha blends employee turning back. grace shuts the door quickly.)
grace: (in a voice loud enough for the whole coffee shop to hear) sorry!

= = = = = = = = = =

(grace is back. deirdre & her drink have moved to a new table.)
grace: i forgot to lock the door.
deirdre: (smiles) i know.
grace: (in a whisper) i was drying my shirt!
(deirdre holds her laughter in)
grace: let's just eat fast, okay?
deirdre: do you want to take the food out? we can eat at my house.
grace: that would look weird. let's just eat fast.
deirdre: okay. (takes a bite of the spicy chicken wings) wow, this is good.

= = = = = = = = = =

deirdre: di ba nga i had a throat infection. then i twisted my ankle. now i bumped my knee into our bedpost. ang sakit talaga!
grace: hello! i'd rather have your pain over my mortification.
deirdre: oo nga, not comparable.

= = = = = = = = = =

(while walking to the car, after gobbling up the chicken wings in record time)
grace: i had my shirt off!
deirdre: what?! oh my...!
grace: i know! i won't be able to go back here for five years. i actually wanted to ask for an official receipt but then they would know my name & would remember grace sarmiento as the girl who knocked off her drink & forgot to lock the CR door while she was drying her shirt.

= = = = = = = = = =

(in the car)
grace: bilis, bilis! i want to get out of here!
deirdre: it won't start. why?!
grace: waaah! pero sa bagay, it could have been worse. i could have been sitting on the bowl.
deirdre: i was afraid to ask that.

= = = = = = = = = =

(as the car is moving out of the parking lot)
deirdre: buti hindi ka nagba-blush. kung ako siguro yun, todo blush na ako.
grace: hindi talaga ako ma-blush, e.
deirdre: siguro there's really mortification that's beyond blushing.
grace: (in her head) gee derder, that really helps. thanks.

= = = = = = = = = =

(after an almost-accident near times)
deirdre: siguro 1,000 ang guardian angels ko ngayon.
grace: kaya naman pala walang nag-guard sa akin ngayon, e!

surreal

i got home very late last night (or very early today). i came from a four and a half hour figaro date with deirdre, so i got to moonwalk at past 12. surprise, surprise, my mom was there, waiting for a jeep with one of her friends!

nung naglalakad na kami, sinabi niyang nag-starbucks daw kasi sila. my mom & starbucks?! unfathomable. haha.

good afternoon, world! : )

one more chance

on the way to the cinema...

nel (walking briskly): bilisan natin!
me: bakit?
nel: baka may makakita sa atin!
(nel, maam maggie & i laugh)
nel: ganito din kami dati sa got 2 believe.

: )

the mermaid chair

" i had thought our lives together were vouchsafed. it was of those unpremeditated facts that i'd live with every single day. like the sun going through its motions - coming and going, an automaton. like the stars fixed in the milky way. who questions these things? they just are".

- jessie sullivan in the mermaid chair
by sue monk kidd

kita-kits sa mcdo : )

one night, after the prayer meeting, at mcdo philam. thanks to ate malou for the pics. : )

mabel & i.

with cleo, & some articles from his collection. : )

pinagtinginan kami ng ibang customers. bakit kaya?! hehe!

in the pressure cooker again

i found myself in a messy fix last week. i had information that i thought a new friend needed to know. sadly, "what you don't know can't hurt you" does not apply in this situation. if i don't tell her, she can get hurt. but if i tell her, she will definitely get hurt.

if she finds out from someone else, i'm sure that she will get mad at me for keeping it from her. but if she finds out from me, she could also get mad at me, & even think that i had an ulterior motive in telling her.

thank heavens, there is a pinprick of light shining from the end of the dark tunnel. if i tell her, she might appreciate my honesty. telling her could, in turn, become the start of an open friendship.

in the end, i decided to tell her. & she did appreciate my honesty.

whew. : )

just thinking

in our party last week, i told embryo about some of the decisions that i've made in the past two years. on second thought, it must be more appropriate to say that i told them how i handled the nerve-wracking events of my past two years - my realizations, the things i said, etc.

it's been a long time, & it's very weird that i only told them the story now. after all, we are pretty tight, it's our style to talk things over, & the experiences i went through are not easy to go through alone. but i guess that's just my way of dealing with the cards dealt to me. & i guess i was only able to tell them the story now because i can now do so in a detached manner. because lately, i've started being happy again. it took me a long while to get here, you know.

so i can't help but feel so flattered that they approve of the way i handled things. 'ika nga ni john, "top 1 sa academics, top 1 sa buhay". nakakatawa kasi habang nagkekwento ako, sobrang in-affirm nila yung decisions ko. feeling ko tuloy, asa pedestal ako. sabi kasi ni eloi, tumaas daw ang respeto niya sa 'kin. eloi & je-ann even memorized some of my lines. je-ann went further by saving it on her phone so she won't forget. haha. :)

i don't remember who said it anymore, but i was told that i am proof that intelligent people are not necessarily stupid in affairs of the heart. sabi nga ni kamille, rational daw ako. nagagamit ko yung talino ko sa pagdedesisyon. sabi niya, hindi ako yung tipong matalino pero wala lang.

funny talaga yung reactions nila. looking back, i don't even know how i managed to say the right things in what deirdre has coined, "pressure cooker moments". siguro, pasalamat na lang ako kay Lord kasi binigyan niya ako ng grace under pressure.

because of their questions, i realized one thing: i make decisions on my own. i rarely ask for advice. i don't know if it's a good or bad thing, but that's the way i do it. i only ask for advice after i've made my choice, & i need help in dealing with the aftershocks of that choice.

so far, it has been working for me. i can't recall a decision that i regretted for years & years on end. sure, there were those i cried about for a while. but even when i was crying about those, i knew that i made the right choice, & that things will turn out well in time.

haha, grabeng pagbubuhat na ito ng bangko. but in the end, all i really want to say is, "thank you for the affirmation." i really needed it, you know. ;)

quotable quotes

just got home from bobby's & john's joint birthday celebration. lest i forget these words in my sleep-deprived state, here they are:

"you can't have all the benefits without the responsibility."

"open ka, open din naman ako, eh di i-close na natin."

cryptic as these may seem without the context, i'll leave these as is. good morning, world! :)

grieving

we just came home from the wake of ate belen, a distant cousin. she died of a stroke last monday. she left behind two teenage kids & her husband.

the way it happened was so sad. she was in church last saturday, when she started feeling dizzy. she was brought to the hospital, & was unconscious ever since.

kuya nono, her husband (who is a distant uncle), was at sea in europe. my mom called him to relay the news. i don't know if he was just in denial, but among the first things he said was maybe, ate belen was just stressed out.

the doctors told ate belen's family that an operation had to be done immediately, though performing it was not a guarantee that she will be able to recover. however, they needed my uncle's consent. understandably so, he wasn't able to decide immediately. he only consented to the operation on monday morning. i'm not sure if the operation was done that time. ate belen died on monday night.

kuya nono arrived only three hours ago. it was so heartbreaking to see him hold his head & hesitate before going inside the room. the room was full, but everyone was quiet as he & his family were gathered around ate belen's casket. i can't even begin to imagine how hard this is for them.

fortune cookie says...

soon, someone will make you very proud.

mangyari lamang ni rico abelardo

mangyari lamang ay tumayo
ang mga nagmamahal
nang makita ng lahat
ang kagandahan ng mukha ng pag-ibig
ipamalas ang tamis
ng malalim na pagkakaunawaan
sa mga malabo ang paningin

mangyari lamang ay tumayo rin
ang mga nagmahal at nasawi
nang makita ng lahat
ang mga sugat ng isang bayani
ipadama ang pait ng kabiguan
habang ipinagbubunyi
ang walang katulad na kagitingan
ng isang nagtataya

mangyari lamang ay tumayo
ang mga nangangambang magmahal
nang makita ng lahat ang kilos ng isang bata
ipamalas ang katapatan ng damdamin
na pilit ikinukubli
ng pusong lumaki sa mga enkanto at diwata

mangyari lamang ay tumayo
ang mga nagmahal, minahal, at iniwan
ngunit handa pa ring magmahal
nang makita ng lahat ang yaman ng karanasan
ipamalas ang mga katotohanang nasaksihan
nang maging makahulugan
ang mga paghahagulgol sa dilim

at sa mga nananatiling nakaupo
mangyari lamang ay dahan-dahang tumalilis
papalabas sa nakangangang pinto
umuwi na kayo
at sumbatan ang mga magulang
na nagpalaki ng isang halimaw

at sa lahat ng naiwang nakatayo
mangyari lamang ay hagkan ang isa't isa
at yakapin ang mga sugatan
mabuhay tayong lahat
na nagsisikap na makabalik
sa ating pinagmulan

manatiling masaya
at higit sa lahat
magpatuloy sa pagmamahal